This is Forever
by Windup-Ragdoll
Summary: They were in love. They were both broken, and all they had was this moment, now. Why would they let that slip away?


**A/N: Okay, well, here it is. My attempt at a funny/sad/sweet Renji and Grimmy fic. Enjoy?**

Renji yawned and cracked one eye open, sleepily stretching his arms over his head and lacing his fingers together underneath his messy red hair. He slid his eyes over to let them rest on the silhouette of the sleeping Grimmjow, covers pulled up to his chest and his face serene in some sort of wonderful dream. God know he deserved it if anybody did. All of his death had been spent killing the innocent and the guilty. He could not imagine that sort of life. It would tear him apart.

Renji swung his legs over the side of the bed and rubbed the sleep from his eyes. He checked the clock. The glaring red numbers informed him that it was early afternoon, way too early to be awake on his day off. He pushed his hair back from his face and slowly stood up. He made his way across the room to the old fashioned radiator which was emitting a steady pulse of cold air throughout the small bedroom. Renji placed his hands along the top ridges of the cold metal, running his fingers along the contours of the machine until he felt as if his hands would freeze. The old device had been busted for some time now, only expelling frigid air from its depths, making it a bugger of a thing in the winter. But for now, it soothed the young man, as not a lot could accomplish that task these days. Not even the man resting on his bed...not lately, anymore.

"Grimmjow?" He whispered gently, bending over the sleeping man and running his fingers through his tangled blue hair. Grimmjow grumbled in his peaceful slumber, rolling over and muttering, "Renji...not now, wake me up later." The redhead sighed and pulled away from the man who used to make him so happy. Lately it seemed they were growing more and more distant; their conversations dwindling down to a few sentences here and there, some days going hours without speaking at all. Anger bubbled up in Renji's stomach suddenly, as if a fire had been lit from within his belly.

"Grimmjow, get your ass up, you lazy son of a bitch," he snarled, smacking the other man's back, hard. His lover merely growled and pulled the thick quilt over his head, burring his face deeper into the pillows. Renji frowned slightly and placed his hands back upon Grimmjow's neck, tracing them along his side and across his back, splaying his fingers wide and feeling the warmth of his skin seep into his hands. And suddenly, he began to cry. He attempted to swallow the lump in his throat and shoved his knuckles into his mouth to keep from howling out. He bit down and let the tears come. They flowed over his hands and ran into his mouth, making him sputter and gag, waking the snoring Grimmjow.

"Ren? Renji, what the fuck?" he asked, very startled at the sight of the young warrior before him, shaking and sobbing. Renji just shook his head and collapsed onto the bed, falling against Grimmjow's chest and letting his arms wrap around his shaking body.

"Jesus Christ, Ren, what the hell is going on?"

No response.

"Seriously, man, if you don't tell me what the fuck is going on, I'm going to beat the shit outta you until you tell me," he threatened, his voice almost wavering, blue eyes filled with an unusual worry. He pulled the young lieutenant tighter against his barrel chest and knotted his fingers in his hair.

"Why don't you tell me stories anymore, you fucker?" Renji choked out suddenly, his voice breaking. Grimmjow cocked his head to one side and raised one thick cobalt eyebrow. In a flat, listless voice he questioned, "What are you talking about? What stories? What the hell are you on?"

Renji lifted his head and stared up into the larger man's face. Exasperatedly, he said, "See? You don't even remember. Every day when you would come home from God knows where covered in someone's congealing blood, you would look at me and smile. Then you would tell me the story of what happened. And we would laugh like the sick little freaks we are...or at least we were..."

"So...what are you saying? You want me to go out and kill something?"

"You're fucking hopeless," Renji replied, his eyes smiling through the veil of saltwater. And then, suddenly, they were kissing fiercely. The tumbled down into the covers, fingers knotting in blue and red hair, shirts and pants discarded. Time seemed to tick by in years, not seconds, as skin was explored and necks were bitten gently. Finally, they lay together, a tangled heap of sweating skin and heaving breath. They drew in each other's breath, as if afraid the air would up and abandon them if they didn't inhale it all as fast as possible. It was a great effort for Renji to swim out of his euphoric haze and stand. He trolled over to the tacky, fake bamboo shutters and twisted open the slats. Light flooded the room, bathing the walls in a surreal golden light and making their bodies seem to shimmer in the late afternoon sun.

"You're incredibly real," Renji said, tilting his head so that his red hair spilled down over his shoulders. Grimmjow snorted, the closest he ever came to laughing lately.

"No shit, Sherlock. And I'm not going anywhere. C'mere," he said, throwing his arms open and beckoning him forward with his thick fingers. Renji smirked. He really did love this bloodthirsty moron, despite the constant ache in his heart, the pit in his stomach. As long as they had this moment, this now, everything was alright. He could breathe, and that was all that mattered.

_Crack the shutters open wide, I wanna bathe you in the light of day_ _And just watch you as the rays tangle up around your face and body_ _I could sit for hours finding new ways to be awed each minute_ _Cause the daylight seems to want you just as much as I want you_


End file.
